Miss Manners Says Party Fee Changes Guest-Host Relationship
A letter writer asked Miss Manners about being invited to a party where guests were charged $5 to attend and also asked to bring a beverage and a gag gift. Miss Manners said charging guests turns them into clients, not…
Anchorage, AK, October 19, 2026 —
A letter writer asked Miss Manners for advice about an invitation that came with several requests: guests were expected to pay a $5 fee to attend, bring a beverage and bring a gag gift.
Miss Manners’ response focused on the charge. She said that asking guests to pay turns them into clients rather than guests, describing the arrangement as a perversion of hospitality. Her answer addressed the distinction between inviting people to a gathering and charging them to take part.
The invitation, as described in the letter, combined the fee with two additional requests. Guests were asked to contribute a beverage and a gag gift, but the account does not provide further details about those requests or explain how they were presented. It also does not say whether the letter writer planned to attend or what response, if any, was given to the host.
The account does not identify the host, the party’s date or location, or the kind of event being organized. Miss Manners’ stated advice, however, centered on the effect of the fee: in her view, charging people to attend changes their role from guests to clients. The response did not include further details about the gathering or additional guidance on the beverage and gift requests.
Story summarized from the original created by Miss Manners | Judith Martin, Nicholas Ivor Martin and Jacobina Martin on www.adn.com, see more information here.
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